Fear is a Normal Emotion – That occurs within your Body when Faced with either a Fearful Situation
Or where Harm to you or others may be involved – Also when You are Faced with Learning Something New
Where Change is going to be Occurring that maybe Different or Difficult & Of Course Your Subconscious of Past Events
I will teach you “How to Use Fear to your Advantage” – Not Allowing Fear To Stop You Building the Life you Want and Born to Live!!
There are two ways to take charge of fear, this will then allow you to transform the fearful emotion into a positive emotional state:
- First it is important to recognize the Fear
- Be specific about your fear so that you can address it in the appropriate way.
- Then acknowledge if it is a genuine fear that is it something you need to be afraid of. If so say you were going to go cliff climbing then ensure that you organize it with a reputable person who has all the correct safety equipment and gear.
- Change the way you see the fearful experience so that it no longer makes you feel fearful.
- So now that you have acknowledged whether the fear is real or perceived Release the fear by letting it go, look the fear in the face, telling it that it no longer has a hold on you.
Today I want to look at Changing How you Perceive Experiences in Your Life
- Choose a person you deal with on a regular basis who you find intimidating. Get started by choosing someone who causes you to feel mild fear.
- Ask yourself — what does it get me feeling fear around this person?
Typically you will answer that the fear causes you to be more alert and careful. However the irony is that when you feel fear you are less capable of responding well to the challenges of the situation.
Let me give you an example. A number of years ago I had a person whom I was working with who tell me off in a very dominating way even if I hadn’t done anything wrong. They would at times become quite angry with me, thump the desk with their hand when just having a general discussion about our work and what needed to be done. I never took this personally because they seem to treat other people in the same way. However I still become fear regarding how they were going to act.
How Did this Fear Affect me?
It meant that I was on guard, careful to say always overly cautious to do the right thing, hoping this help to keep them calm.
- This was not an ideal situation!
So if you are not able influence the behaviour of the person who is your intimidator it is vitally important to change your thinking toward your intimidator so as to change the way you feel.
In the case of my situation when they shouted or slammed the desk I would walk away, saying I would engage when they were feeling better.
By giving this person the space and not engaging in their irrational behaviour not only helped as I felt stronger in my emotions, but they recognized their actions as being unacceptable without me saying anything… However it is not enough you also need to change how you feel.
Before you commencing following approach and putting it into action, put yourself into a good energy space, feeling energetic and determined to work through this otherwise you could become pulled back into the fear itself.
Now looking at the recent encounter with the intimidator, play the scene in your mind as if you are watching it on TV. Pretend you are outside the area watching as if you were a bystander.
Next, distort the images until the other person looks quite funny, maybe a cartoon character that gives you a smile or giggle. Dress the person in clothes to suite that cartoon character. Change their voice sounding like the cartoon character. Slow down their speech until it sounds like a tape in slow motion. Then speed up the speaking until they sound like a bumble bee or the character of your choice.
Play the scene backwards, upside down, sideways anyway you like. Do whatever you have to until the scene so that it is absolutely hilarious.
So now keep playing these sounds and images until you are either laughing or at least smiling when you think of the intimidator.
Now you have turned fear into a more resourceful emotional state. Well done!
As you first commence this technique you will need to run through it several times until you have formed it as a positive habit for you. Also then learning to use it for other difficult situations I recommend using it daily to shake off those unpleasant feelings of fear you have associated to that person.
If it is not necessarily a person but an event you can then use your mind and emotions to seek out the things that make your fearful then imagine them as something wonderful, exciting and visualizing the benefits the event or situation will give you.
Looking at the Benefits of Fear and the Actual Fear Itself
Fear serves us by allowing us the opportunity of recognizing what we want or how we want things to be. So for example when someone is yelling at us making us feel fearful it is important to recognize that this is not how you want to be treated. If the fear is that of learning a new program or skill, then recognizing that you will not allow this fear to take over because this new program or skill is either going to make your life easier or may be earn you more money.
So fear in itself gives us a sense of awareness, being alerted to a situation may be looking at the safety and the strategies or things we need to put into place to make it safe.
How to Behave Positively with a Feeling of Strength of Emotions with your Intimidator
You will need to write down, running through likely scenarios in your mind until you have prepared yourself that you can handle the situation with ease and calm.
In my situation I was mentally ready to move myself right away from the situation and person.
Become in charge of your life by ensuring that you spend less than you earn so that you have savings. Do have insurances especially for things such as health and your assets.
When you have changed how you feel without dealing effectively with the situation then you will find yourself back in the same situation until you deal with it effectively. I call it getting my head in the right space, so what it actually is, is getting your thinking right so you can work at the event, situation, relationship whatever it is in a positive way without feeling fearful or aggressive.
The goal to aim for here is to be resourceful, then you will feel empowered and emotional stronger.
Using your Higher Intelligence in Dealing with Difficult People
I know that using these tips will help you. However, how much this information helps will depend on you putting these Simple, yet Effective strategies into place, your confidence will improve and your self-esteem will grow.
Obviously for violent situations or past emotional traumatic experience you will need a Professional person to work with you, you will need to choose someone who will give you empathy, but not sympathy and positive strategies and treatments to help you to move forward.